Best of Desi Jokes: Student Jokes

Showing posts with label Student Jokes. Show all posts

Do you have a Boyfriend?

A girl's phone rings with unknown number..

He: Do you have a boyfriend?

She: Yes! who are you?

He: Tera Bhai..ruk kamini ghar aata hoon teri dhulai karne!
.
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Another unknown call:

He: Do you have a boyfriend?

She: Oh no no! who are you?

What Happens When a Girl Put :( as her Facebook Status...

Girls Comments:

1. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! :O Kya Hua..?

2. Hey, Every Thing Okay ? Should I Call ? :(

3. Hey, Don't Be Sad. Tell Me What Happened? :/

4. Everything's Gonna Be Okay Baby, Chill :*

[ Now what happens When a Guy Put :( in his status...

Bimar engineering student se mummy Boli:

Jaakar Jaanwar Ke Doctor Ko Dikha, To Hi Thik Hoga..

Beta: Aisa Kyon?

Mum: Roz Subah Murge Ki Tarah Uth Jata Hai,

Ghode ki tarah bhag k college me jata hai,

Teacher: Where is the CAPITAL of India ?

Student: In Swiss Bank mam..

How many Apples can u eat in empty stomach?

Boy: How many apples can you eat in empty stomach?

Girl: I can eat 6 apples.

Boy: You can eat only 1 apple in empty stomach, coz wen you eat the 2nd apple that's not in empty stomach.

Girl: waow!! super joke.. I'll tell my friend.

Girl 2 Other Girl: How many apple can you eat in empty stomach?

Other Girl: I can eat 10.

Girl: Hatt yaar, 6 bolti toh mast joke sunati...!!!

Sonia Jee ka School Visit

Apni Sonia Jee 1 school visit karne gayi. 1 class me aa kar boli bachcho koi sawal puchna hai to pucho.

Papu bola mere 3 sawal hai

1) Aap khud prime minister Q nahi bani?
2) Ramleela maidan me police kisne bheji?
3) Apka kitna paisa Swiss bank me hai?

Isse pehle ki Sonia ji jawab deti half time ke bell ho gayi.

After half time..

Desi Man: Beta, what is the chemical formula for water?

Son: H I J K L M N O.

Desi Man: What are you talking about?

Son: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

Why lots of Students Fail the Exam?

It’s not the fault of a student if he/she fails his exam, let's see what are the reasons..

Typical academic year for a student. 365 Days

1. Sundays-52, Sundays are for rest.

Days left 313.

2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.

Days left 263.

A Sardar reported for his university final examination that consisted of yes/no type questions.

He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, checks his pocket, takes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes for Heads, and No for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out.

During the last few minutes he is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on."I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."

Murghi Teacher

Mom: Beta kio roo rahay ho?

Beta: Teacher nay maraa mujhe.

Mom: Kiun maraa?

Beta: Main ne unko MURGHI kaha tha.

Mom: Kiun kaha tha?

Beta: Wo hamesha test main anda deti hain.

Zoo Visit

Father and Bibek were standing in front of the tiger's cage at the zoo.

The father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and Bibek was taking it all in with a serious

"Dad," Bibek said finally, "if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up …"

"Yes, son?" the father said expectantly.

"What bus should I take home?" Bibek finished.

Desi English Class

Santa's son was poor in English. So he sent him to learn the language in the best coaching class of the town. Teacher was teaching about active and passive voice.

After finishing his lesson, he asked Santa's son: What will be the passive voice of 'I made a mistake'?

Santa's son took it easy and answered: "I was made by a mistake."

Anger Management

Sometimes it become hard to manage your anger. But it is not so hard if you follow in this example:

Dad to Bibek: When I beat you how did you control your anger?

Bibek: I start cleaning the toilet.

Dad: How does that satisfy you?

Bibek: I clean it with your tooth brush.

Sleeping with Baby

Bibek went to his Dad's Friend's home late night. Uncle offered him to Sleep in Baby's room. Bibek refused because the Baby might Cry at Night and went to sleep in the drawing hall.

Next morning he saw a Beautiful young Girl at the breakfast table..

Bibek : Who are you?

The girl replied,"I am Baby and You??"

Bibek : I am a Stupid!!!

Mathematical Knowledge

“If you had a 100 Rupees,” quizzed the teacher, “and you asked your father for another 50 rupees, how much money would you have?”

“100 Rupees,” answered Bibek.

“You don’t know your basic math,” said the teacher shaking her head, disappointed.

Bibek shook his head too, “You don’t know my daddy…”

Chemistry Class

Teacher: What is the chemical symbol of Barium?

Student: BA

Teacher: For sodium?

Student: NA

Teacher: What will we get if 1 atom of BA and 2 atom of NA combines?

Student: "BANANA”